ETA

too damn late

sorry.

it wasn't any of my business anyways.


---

Honesty really is the worst policy.

I really need to get better at this whole feelings thing.

Because self-awareness leads to self-mocking, and then you don't feel like sharing anymore.

And sharing is caring!

OH NOEZ.

=> I'm pretending not to care.

---

In other news, I'm moving (just to a different house) in a few months. Summer's been okay so far.

:"D

Caught a cold. Getting better now.

Became old. Still no love life. Forever alone. :(

Am now able to buy stripper heels if I have the money. Hooray for the Internet. They're really expensive and require international shipping.

Still, stripper heels in size 2. Who wouldn't want a pair?

Contracted computer virus. Fixed the whole thing by myself. Felt accomplished.

I want to learn how to sew. It seems useful.

it's been a while!

E-MAIL used CONFUSION! VAN is confused! VAN hurt itself in its confusion!

I thought you guys forgot I existed for half of Saturday. I(t) was really sad, I shouldn't get paranoid about things like this so easily~ Afterwards, it was "Oops, wrong e-mail~ I have confirmed my existence!" and now I am confused.

... is the party today or not? And where is it? What should I get you, Rachel and Shandersonnnnn?

---

So it's been a while since I've blogged, and my old post is still relevant. The feeling you get when you've eaten a lot really fast and the food hasn't reached your stomach at kind of sucks, too. :O Trying to restrict the kind of pointless eating that results in fatness is hard...

---

I've been on a Touhou binge lately. Bullet hell games are amazing. Play them, even if you suck like me and can't win without continuing on anything above Easy mode...

The music's good, too. :D

You are now dodging very slow bullets. Manually.

---

... I don't really have anything to talk about. Happy belated Chinese New Year? I ate a lot, as usual.

Oh, on Chinese New Year's Eve (also Clarence's birthday~), we went out to eat, and I had this really good lemon sour cream ice cream on carrot cake. It's better than it sounds~ it tasted like lemon cheesecake in ice cream form! The carrot cake was amazing, too.

---

why does this whole post talk about me. I should gain more interesting knowledge so I can write about that instead?

---

Oh, right, school. It was okay. I maintained my combo! Report cards are late. :(

aaaaaaahhhhhhh

You know that feeling when you're not actually hungry, but you really, really want to eat?

Yeah.

Looking at recipes and pictures of food doesn't help.

Looking at the calorie counts makes me want to eat them more. :|

christmas on the internet.

>spend Christmas on /r9k/
>don't even post, just lurk
>can't even bring self to post on most beta board on the Internet
>aloneforever.jpg
>;_;

On the bright side, the new USB is shaped like a penguin!

Other bright sides: turkey.

Merry Christmas/happy holidays/season's greetings/etc, everyone!

>:D

I just woke up from a dream of being a SKY PIRATE.

It was so awesome. Also there was a cute guy.

In other news, I got a haircut and now have straight bangs.

so relaxing!

So I spent my entire weekend playing Animal Crossing.

On the bright side, I made three perfect snowmen over the course of two days. Go go my brother's horrible time traveling mistakes!

My DS touchscreen is dying. Maybe I will get a 3DS when it comes out, even if only for Animal Crossing 3DS.

Yes, I am lame.

People, bring your copies over on the 29th. o: I must steal your things. Is anyone else still playing/picked the game back up?

---

Yesterday, we went to The Body Shop at the Eaton Center. They had this spin-the-wheel thing, and my mommy spun 50% off of everything. She's amazing like that. Also, we'd brought coupons that had 50% off of everything (if we spent $40 or more).

So we got $80 worth of stuff for $20. My hands went from looking like they were dipped in chalk and then sun-dried to silky smooth and smelling like cherry blossoms. ♥

I really love subtle floral scents, especially the ones with just a hint of sweetness. ♥ Like moringa/aqua lily/cherry blossoms. o: Lavender, too.

---

My super unrealistic Christmas wish list:

1. A longer holiday, yes. ._.;
2. Better marks! (Effort optional.)
3. New clothes!
4. Ability to eat all I want (and not exercise) without getting fat.
5. Alternatively, willpower to and enjoyment of exercise.
6. More time.
7. GROW TALLER.
8. To quote Sarah, "A guy that's not a completely horrendous human being might be nice xD."
9. Mini frozen cream puffs!
10. A pair of nice flats that actually fit.
11. Pretty high heels! o:
12. A pillow that will not lose its volume when squished.
13. Moneyyyy.
14. To find an actual use for a text plan. :(
15. ... for my hair to stop randomly falling out. Apparently, this involves Vitamin D.
16. Ability to ingest calcium pills without feeling weirdly sick. o-o;
17. A copy of Sims 3. o:
18. A new hairband that I can wear every day, as this seems to be something I am known for doing.
19. To make an amazing gingerbread house!
20. A white Christmas. o:
21. For something genuinely exciting to happen.
22. A box of matches, a candle, and some toothpicks.
23. To improve my vocabulary. o: Wordcount is decreasing.
24. A hug. :)

odds and ends

New phone! :D Same number, but texting is now an option. It is amazing and using it to listen to the jazz station is also amazing.

---

There's a new (?) reality show out, called Bridalplasty, where a group of twelve new brides compete to... get extensive plastic surgery. Everywhere.

Reality show producers have the most amazingly sociopathic ideas. I should try and meet one sometime.

---

Revelation of the day: buy capris. Wear as normal jeans. Profit!

(Why do I have such short legs? ._.;)

---

I can't find my copies of Pokemon, Harvest Moon, or Animal Crossing.

Where did they gooo? ;_;

Is the world trying to tell me to grow up? Not until I ACTUALLY GROW, YOU FUCKERS. D:

---

Let's all go shopping after winter break, so we can get together and not be stampeded.

Also, ice skating! :D

those mattresses explode, you know.

And you can hide bodies in them -

I now have a formspring.

username is vanshaped

I should have made some kind of a mattress pun.

Marks.

Everyone is worrying about them. I lost my 100 Accounting average. ;_;feelsbadman.

"Offended" is mostly repeats, meh. Tolerance is built up, anyways. I am immune.

---

Yesterday, I asked my dad where to get volunteer hours.

He suggested - in these words - "masked vigilante justice."

myparentsaresomatureandhelpful.jpg

---

... nothing happened, really. I bought new boots? They're nice, but the colour is harder to match than before.

---

Renovation is unpleasant. The sawdust everywhere is not exactly doing wonders for my complexion. My room is full of paint fumes, my clothes are inaccessible, and chainsaws are loud. Also, the beveled glass doors were replaced with uglier, non-beveled glass doors. However, the cost will all be recouped when the house is eventually sold.

On the bright side, my window will be able to open after this.

Also, we will be able to PRESS B TO SLIDE WHEN RUNNING. Hardwood flooring is an amazing thing.

what do.

It seems that the more I want to succeed at something, the worse I am at it.

French mark is still dropping. Perhaps I was on hallucinogenic drugs while writing that test and was so traumatized by the experience I forgot about it.

Also worried about English mark. Apparently, over 50% of the class was in the 60-70 range. This does not bode well.

ARCT is still hard, not that it's not supposed to be.

Does anyone know where to get a volunteer job that is not at a summer camp? You would not entrust me with your children (or to them).

---

No news is okay news.

How are you?

for terrible people.

This is bad and you should feel bad.

---

In fact, it's terrible.

---

What a waste.

Disregard it.

---

In other news, my math average dropped six percent with one test. I was almost impressed.

My French average is also sad. It is even sadder than my math average because it is a c-c-c-combo breaker.

However, what I truly regret to inform you is:
I have failed Lunch. :c

Someone tutor me? It's really hard, I don't get it at all...

---

Really, there's nothing to talk about. I'm posting because I want to get that other thing off the top of my blog.

ARCT is hard. Sonata Pathetique is going to give me carpal tunnel syndrome. Also, the books are ridiculously expensive and I have to buy everything separately.

Nylons are hard to put on and easy to make holes in.

Time is easy to lose but hard to find, much like...

... the gummy bear vitamins that were dropped and ran away. :c I hope they find a better life... under the table... or wherever they are now.

Godspeed, gummy bears. I wish you all the best.

if you're listening

Thank you.

For the times you cheered me up - thank you.

For the times you couldn't - thank you.

For the times we laughed together - thank you.

For the times we didn't -
          (for those moments, too - thank you -
for these memories.)


For the things I've learned
and things I haven't, yet -

thank you.

For the sound of your voice, for the comfort of your smile,
            (for every little thing) -


Thank you.






Thank you.















Thank you.

and if you can hear me

you've always been welcome, here.

---

Fill in the blank.

\__/ Bucket list: 0% complete.

Except I kind of splattered beef stew when microwaving it that one time, so maybe it counts as blowing something up...?

If I wrote a lifetime bucket list, it would have "commit arson" on it, maybe.

LIFETIME BUCKET LIST SO FAR (IN ORDER OF APPEARANCE):
1. Commit arson.
2. Be over 5 feet tall.
3. Eat a whole box of tissues in one sitting. Never mind, I don't actually want to do this.
4. Realize that someone I know is actually a sociopath.
5. Run with scissors (again).

Bucket list.

Aren't these things usually to be done before you 'kick the bucket' - that is, die?

I think that's the origin of the term, anyways...

---

1. Host a party. :c
2. Go outside. By myself. Without prompting. For over an hour. No, seriously, I don't think I've ever done this before. brb being overwhelmed by own lameness
3. Host... a sleepover...? Or attend one...?
4. Make more friends. :c
5. Come to a revelation without being overwhelmed by own lameness
6. Go somewhere using public transit! By myself! Or walk somewhere by myself. The possibility that I will get yelled at for trying this is very real. This is why I have not done this before, except for that one time I walked home from school by myself and it was so awesome but nobody really cared. brb being overwhelmed by own lameness
7. Finish reading those philosophy books.
8. Go outside on a sunny day using an umbrella.
9. Wear contacts a lot.
10. Get a boyfriend. ... this probably won't happen. :c
11. GROW A FEW INCHES. VERTICALLY THIS TIME, DAMMIT. IS THAT REALLY TOO MUCH TO ASK.
12. Grow a shoe size or two! Would make life much more convenient. And would enable me to look several inches taller.
13. Get highlights again!
14. Learn to curl hair in a way that does not look retarded.
15. Clean room. Dump old stuff for once.
16. Wear over-the-knee socks/thigh-highs more often. 8D
17. Get one of you guys to play Mabinogi with meeee. And/or make actual friends on Mabinogi. :c I can't even make friends online what is this brb being overwhelmed by own lameness
18. BLOW SOMETHING UP.
19. go... swimming? DOES ANYONE WANT TO GO SWIMMING. LET'S GO SWIMMING, PEOPLE.

In conclusion, anyone want to go swimming?

I'm not really looking forward to school. Also, they screwed up my timetable. >:|

However, I am looking forward to the public transit adventure...!

SWIMMING. WANNA GO. ANYONE.